"You're not alone. Together we stand.
I'll be by your side. You know I'll take your hand.
When it gets cold and it feels like the end,
There's no place to go, you know I won't give in.
No, I won't give in.
Keep Holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through.
Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you."
--Avril Lavigne "Keep Holding On"
Dear Diary,
I've been thinking about how lonely it is to be sick. How it feels like I can be standing in a room with 100 people, yet be alone. How it feels like no one understands; like no one gets it, like no one gets me. I feel like everyone thinks they know what it's like to be me. They think they know what it's like to have tubes, be in pain, be tired, and be sick all of the time. They tell me "I understand, sweetie. It will be okay.", but they have no idea. They have no idea, diary, what its like to not be able to go to sleep at night because you're in pain and nauseas. They have no idea what it is like to be given pill after pill in hopes that one will help. They have no idea what it's like to have to worry about every little germ, every cold outbreak, and every flu strain because your body isn't strong enough to fight them off and you'll most likely catch something.
They have no idea what it's like to deal with a chronic illness, and they don't even try to understand.
They treat me like I'm so fragile.
That I'm like good china or a glass vase.
That I'm going to break.
They tiptoe around my feelings afraid that if they ask me something I'll be mad or upset. They just assume things about me. Sometimes, its feels that people thinks sick is another word for voiceless. I can assure you, diary, I am not voiceless.
It's time people heard me.
I don't want to be treated like I am fragile and tiptoed around like I'm going to break at any second. I'm not going to break. I don't want to people to feel like they can't talk to me or ask me questions, diary.
Somedays it feels like the only people that get it are other people with chronic illness. They know what it's like to be sick. They know what it's like to feel alone, and it helps. It helps to know that other people get it. It helps to know that I'm not the only one that feels the way I do. It helps to know that I may have a chronic illness, but I'm not the only one going through it.
It helps to know that I really am not alone.
That I'm not the only one who has to fight.
That I'm not the only one with scars and tubes.
That I'm not the only one that's sick.
Love Forever & Always,
Me
I'll be by your side. You know I'll take your hand.
When it gets cold and it feels like the end,
There's no place to go, you know I won't give in.
No, I won't give in.
Keep Holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through.
Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you."
--Avril Lavigne "Keep Holding On"
Dear Diary,
I've been thinking about how lonely it is to be sick. How it feels like I can be standing in a room with 100 people, yet be alone. How it feels like no one understands; like no one gets it, like no one gets me. I feel like everyone thinks they know what it's like to be me. They think they know what it's like to have tubes, be in pain, be tired, and be sick all of the time. They tell me "I understand, sweetie. It will be okay.", but they have no idea. They have no idea, diary, what its like to not be able to go to sleep at night because you're in pain and nauseas. They have no idea what it is like to be given pill after pill in hopes that one will help. They have no idea what it's like to have to worry about every little germ, every cold outbreak, and every flu strain because your body isn't strong enough to fight them off and you'll most likely catch something.
They have no idea what it's like to deal with a chronic illness, and they don't even try to understand.
They treat me like I'm so fragile.
That I'm like good china or a glass vase.
That I'm going to break.
They tiptoe around my feelings afraid that if they ask me something I'll be mad or upset. They just assume things about me. Sometimes, its feels that people thinks sick is another word for voiceless. I can assure you, diary, I am not voiceless.
It's time people heard me.
I don't want to be treated like I am fragile and tiptoed around like I'm going to break at any second. I'm not going to break. I don't want to people to feel like they can't talk to me or ask me questions, diary.
Somedays it feels like the only people that get it are other people with chronic illness. They know what it's like to be sick. They know what it's like to feel alone, and it helps. It helps to know that other people get it. It helps to know that I'm not the only one that feels the way I do. It helps to know that I may have a chronic illness, but I'm not the only one going through it.
It helps to know that I really am not alone.
That I'm not the only one who has to fight.
That I'm not the only one with scars and tubes.
That I'm not the only one that's sick.
Love Forever & Always,
Me
Ashley you're not alone! You're right that those of us from the chronic illness community "get it". We're behind you girl!!! We've got your back!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks you for putting into words many of the feelings I have that I've been unable to communicate to the healthy world. You're a GREAT writer!! Keep up the good work! I look forward to every post because I know you're going to put a voice to feelings I have that I can't put a words to.
You're amazing and don't let anyone tell silence what you have to say. you're not fragile!! If anything, you're one tough chick after what you've been thru!! You have a lot of good to say & I for one am listening!!
You go girl!! Take this and run, ok maybe walk gingerly thru the pain, but continue on!! You're inspiring!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
Hope you have as comfortable a day as possible!! Hang in there!!
Sandy
Hi Sandy,
DeleteThis message means so much to me, so Thank you! I'm glad I could put your feelings to words. I think sometimes it really helps to be able to voice, or have someone to voice, your feelings and emotions. I'm glad I could be that person to you. It means a lot to me that you read my blog. Stay strong, You are not alone either!
Ashley